Last Friday I had an interview at the Rock Island Arsenal for a security position. Being that I was Security Forces in the military I figured I would not have a problem landing it.  They only had 10 positions available with 32 people showing up.  I got there about 0840 for the 0900 interview that lasted about 15 minutes.  They then made myself and 21 others wait until 230 just to tell us that we didn’t make the cut.  I wan’t mad, just disappointed.  I mean, there were a lot of qualified veterans, some medically retired. Friday night though I received a call for an interview today for a residential counselor position.  I’m pretty excited and thought well maybe me not getting that job at the arsenal was a good thing.  The pay is not very good but it is a foot in the door in the counseling world.  I would eventually like to end up counseling at the VA. 

My wifey and I are going to Puerto Villarta in Aug, should be fun. Here is the kicker though…I have wanted to go back to Texas since I first left in 2003.  I’ve gone so far as telling wifey that if we were to get divorced, I’d hope on the first greyhound back.  Well wouldn’t you know, our flight home first has a stop in Dallas.  That sucks.  Im trying to convince the airline to change our return date back to the shithole Midwest by at least 4 days.  I have friends in Tex that I want to see.  It will probably be a no go though.  Just my luck.  

Currently, I’m trying to order my book for class.  I ordered it through amazon and they send me 2nd edition instead of 5th edition.  Collage books are a joke.  Especially now that they are moving toward electronic books.  Example, I have to pay on average $65 to rent an electric book.  This gives me access to this for 180 days.  There is no way in hell that anyone should have to pay that just to rent a licensing fee.  


Image Ok…So lets say that time travel has already been invented, but in the future. Those in the future are coming back to the past, our present, and changing things that will affect us in our future.  Perhaps that nuclear bomb that was accidently dropped on South Carolina back in 1958 really went off, killing thousands of people.  But our good friends in the future went back to 1958 and stopped that from happening, saving all those lives. lol  Yeah folks, it’s that kind of day.   Yesterday I went to the track field with my wifey and with the exception of my burning feet, it wasn’t that bad.  I walked two laps then ran/walked the other two.  I give credit to those who are overweight that can run for long periods of time.  I suppose if i did it everyday my legs would get used to the weight.  


Today was not a bad day really.  Dad picked me up in his new ride and we went to lunch with my nieces.   I got a lead about a security guard position at the Rock Island Arsenal today and a friend of mines husband is one of the Sgt’s there.  Interview is next Friday and being that I have the Security Forces background, it should go okay.  So, back in the day…like 3 years ago I used to do this thing on Youtube called “Things on my Mind”.  It was basically a bitch and gripe session with me talking about issues that are going on not only in the US but around the world.  Well, instead of making a video, allow me to do a “Things on my Mind”, wordpress edition.

5- What’s the deal with your Guy Fawkes tattoo?10441200_10152483498189326_5506299916194298092_n  The mask actually has a few meaning to it.  It originally gained its popularity in V for Vendetta, but then became symbolic for different types of protest.  I wanted the words “Ideas are bulletproof” tattooed under the face, but my tattooist said the letters would be too small and wouldn’t like good a few years from now.  “Ideas are bulletproof” basically means that no matter how much society or the government tries to silence you, they can never silence your ideas or thoughts.

4-What’s the deal with your “BeLIEve” tattoo? 10427232_10152483521824326_614265202046238193_n The image is actually a piece of artwork done by Derek Hess who is an awesome artist.  I put the beLIEve under it as symbolism.  The picture looks like Jesus on the cross (without the cross of course).  I was raised catholic and still am to this day, however I don’t practice it.  I don’t believe in the bible and I don’t believe you have to go to church or pay towards the church, in order for you to be forgiven or go to heaven.  The church says you need to believe in everything it preaches for you to be saved, and I think that’s a lie.  I don’t have to go to a building to talk to Jesus, I don’t have to give 10% of my check to the church to talk to Jesus, I don’t have to believe in a book that is used in today’s society as a “Go to heaven for Dummies” book.  I believe that women should get abortions, I believe that gays should be able to get married and have children.  I believe that priest should be able to get married.  I also don’t necessarily believe in hell.  I think that if one wants to get into heaven they need to do good and accomplish good during their time on Earth, if not, they get reincarnated.  So hell is you having to do all this over again, losing loved ones, being abused, winning the lottery, whatever, but you have to do good this time around or …you get to do it again.

3- Obama.  WTF?  I voted for President Obama twice.  I also voted for Bush and Clinton.  Obama is pissing me off something fierce.  First, Sgt. Bowe Bergdahl is freed after we hand over 5 terrorist.  Now I know the “we don’t negotiate with terrorist” thing is bullshit.  We’ve negotiated with all kinds of terrorist in the past.  Reagan did it during the Iran-Contra affair, so again it’s not new.  What pisses me off though is that we gave up 5 shitheads that have already vowed to fight against the United States again.  I don’t think Bergadahl is the poor little soldier that some are portraying.  Second and number 2….

2- Iraq.  Iraq get their shit together and now wants the US to come play babysitter again.  To fucking bad.  I would think different if the Iraq’s were behind us the entire time after we “liberated” them from Saddam, but when Iraq’s started to kill our troops, then screw you and your ugly camel.  Now, I’m not dumb, I know the US wasn’t always doing the right thing over there, but when you are doing your fifth deployment in as many years, you are bound to snap.  Our guys trained those men to fight for their country, and what happens?  These dumbass’s are abandaning thier post or are getting kidnapped then executed.  Shoot back you dumbshits.  Anyways back to Obama.  He stated that we would not send any troops back to Iraq.  However today, he states that he will be sending back 300 US military advisors.  WTF are these advisors going to tell the insurgents? “fightings bad emkay”  Come on man…

1-Fox News is a joke, but CNN isn’t far off with their bullshit breaking news every goddamn half hour.  Matter of fact, last night I was changing the channels when I came across CNN Breaking News Special Report, I was like aaah shit…you know what it was?  Fucking OJ SIMPSON car chase from 20 goddamn years ago.  Really CNN…really?  I just sat on my couch with a dumbfounded look on my face.  CNN, you really aren’t helping yourselves.


ImageWell shit….yep that’s how I feel.  Today sucked ass.  Why?  I don’t know, it just did.  I did have fun with my wifey tonight since we went to see 22 Jump Street which was very funny.  I was able to talk to a past client yesterday.  Wont give her name, but she is a pretty cool chick.  She thanked me for helping her during her rehabilitation by being someone she could talk to.  She told me that I was one of the reasons she was now sober.  I told her that she did not need to thank me, she is sober cause she chooses to be, I can’t take credit for that.  Im tired right now, not just physically, but mentally.  I complain about my back and how the VA sucks ass, but then I take a step back and think about all my “brothers and sisters” who are coming back from the war missing limbs or are mentally unfit to return to civilian life and realize that someone will always have it worse than you.  I hate the Midwest with a passion. This is probably a safe place cause I know terrorist wouldn’t waste a bomb on this shit hole.  I want to move to TX but my family is here. Every time I think of moving I start to think about my dad.  We wouldn’t be able to go to Hawk games like we do now if I moved. Then again, he and my mom would be able to come visit in awesome weather in TX when it snows here.  Plus I have all my little nieces and nephews that I want to see grow up.  I’m the oldest child so I didn’t have any other kids to play with like they do.  Nope it was just me until my sisters Jamie and Kali came along.  


This morning I went with my dad to “play” golf.  He took it back to 1986 and spanked my ass.  That’s ok though, I’ll get better.  Just wish I hadn’t waited till I was 35 to try to start.  Anyways, A friend of mind lost her sister last night to a car accident.  I really feel bad for her even though I haven’t seen her in about 11 years.  She is a military friend, and the thing with military friends is that you will have them till the day you die.  I have about 6 people that I was stationed with that I still talk to.  I can call any of them up and it would be as if we just talked a week ago.  I told my cousin whom just join the Marines, that he needs to take it all in and the friends he makes today will be in his life 20 years from now, god willing of course.  Still no job yet, which is why I am sitting here in Starbucks.  Sucks…really sucks.  I do have an interview tomorrow though at a disability center.  I’m not counting my chickens before they hatch so we’ll just see how it goes.  


Woke up this morning will all intentions of going to Starbucks to do my homework while wifey did the cancer run.  I get to Starbucks, order my venti iced chi tea and get a phone call from wifey telling me to meet her at Village Inn.  Damn…so yeah, I packed my shit back up and met her and her sisters at VI.  After we finished, I again had all intentions of going to Starbucks. Nope, drove past a park and thought shit, I should go metal detecting on this awesome day.  After finding about $1 in change I figured it was time to go home.  So now I sit here, knowing I should be doing my homework, but instead I’m listening to music and doing laundry.  Should have just stayed at Village Inn.  


So…today is my cake day and I spent the morning golfing with my dad and uncle.  I don’t golf, but my dad asked me to go and it was actually fun.  I figured hell, I play Tiger Woods all the time on my Playstation, can’t be that much different right? lol  Even though its my cake day, it doesn’t really do anything for me.  I did get a call today about an interview on Tuesday, so i have that going for me.  Now i’m just sitting here watching ESP vs NED football, and waiting for tonight when wifey, my parents and a few others go out to dinner.  My damn body hurts like a bitch right now.  


Well, tomorrow is my birthday, 35 years old.  I sit here in Starbucks, which i’ve done everyday for the past 2 weeks, looking for jobs online.  I had a great job with CADS, loved it, loved the clients, loved my staff, hated the back office bullshit.  My supervisor said it was because I didn’t like to listen to authority.  My father was a cop for 28 years, I was in the military, and I was a corrections officer.  Listening to authority is not the problem.  I left my awesome well paying job because I don’t like when people get shit on.  When I was hired, I was told that they (HR) wanted me to get rid of four members of the staff that they did not like because they “caused problems”.  So for the first couple of months, I played the dick.. writing these people up for petty shit, because HR was too much of a bitch to do it themselves.

One of my staff members who left on her own only a week prior to me, really had it rough.  I felt bad because my supervisor had me write her up all the time, or consistently watch her to see if she messed up.  It got to the point were even if she did mess up, I wan’t going to write her up.  She was good for the clients, and the clients were good for her.  The CEO is nuts and this is going to be CADS downfall. Someone in building “A” cannot tell people in building “B” how to do something when they only sit their ass in building “A”.  If I was able to do the job that I was hired for, and the other two supervisors were able to do the same, then we would have had that place on lock.  You can’t bitch when someone overdoses when you wont let us strip search them.  Would you rather explain why someone OD in your building or would you rather explain why you strip searched someone and found drugs?

I told HR that I wanted to be a counselor when I was first hired.  “Oh, no problem, you just have to wait six months and when you are off your probation you can put in for it.”  Bullshit.  Six months in and I was told that i didn’t have the education.  The job description stated that one only needs a bachelor’s degree.  I have one, plus I’m working on my masters.  Ironically, HR came up to one of my staff members and told him that he needed to hurry up and get his bachelors so they can make him a counselor.  Talk about a slap in the face.  This isn’t sour grapes or me crying over spilled milk, but the fact that you tell me that I can do something, only to go back on your word is bullshit.

So again, I sit here jobless, worried about money…all cause I don’t kiss ass.