It’s been a while since i’ve last posted on here, but i figured today would be the best time. In prior blogs i’ve talked about how my dad had memories of the Blackhawks with my grandpa and how I have memories of my dad. From going to the Blackhawks game at the old Chicago Stadium, to him bringing me Garbage Pail Kids home when he got off work, to him calling 1800BetsOff on me when i had a problem gambling.
Memories are worth more than money. We will always have memories, while money will run out. Of course one could argue that Alzheimer patients lose their memory but lets not get technical here.
For many years when i would go watch the 4th of July fireworks, I looked around as people played catch with their kids, or had a mini cookout with their kids, waiting for the fireworks to start. And for many years i could only imagine what that felt like.
Well yesterday, with my daughter on my lap, the first firework went off..then the next..then the next.. I sat there holding her and feeling her little heartbeat steady rising from the explosions. Not only did i see the explosions in the sky, but felt an explosion of feelings as I sat there holding here. This little 6 month hold, feeling secure with her daddy’s arms around her…just one of the many times that she will have this feeling until the day I die.
I had my family take pictues of us because i wanted her to have a keepsake of her first 4th of July fireworks. I told myself I wanted the pictures for her because she wont have any memory of this when she gets older. But perhaps the one that needed the memories is not her, but me. I wanted that memory of holding my daughter for her first firework show. I wanted the memory of wanting something for so long, and finally being able to have it.
I can’t lie..as the explosion of colors lit the night sky, I sat there with my daughter in my arms, with tears in my eyes. Her eyes fixated on the sky, not knowing that she’s giving her dad the memories he always wanted.